Chalu Zone

12) The Da Vinci Room

2005-12-19T08:19:00.000-08:00

Yet another great contribution from the the maestro of chalu: Unni. Here it is:

Da Vanci was building a new grand house for himself. But he asked the architect and engineer to pay really good attention and effort for one special room. Which is that room?

Ans: The Drawing Room!

11) The Last Wish(es)

2005-12-07T03:34:00.000-08:00

A good contribution by sciz. Check it out! And be sure to have a lot of patience:

Once there was this man, working in a lighthouse all one on a lonely island.The island was 100's of miles from the mainland, and completely deserted.One fine day, he sees a shipwreck on the horizon.Through his telescope, he sees that all the sailors die except one who manages to swim ashore.Feeling pity on this man, the man in the light house decides to help him out.So he climbs all the way down the spiral stairs, after that he crosses the long pathway that leads to the beach, and then walks all the way to the end of the beach where the sailor had landed.On reaching the person, he realised that the man was on the edge of death...so as a last wish the sailor asks for one last wish to be granted.The man from the lighthouse agrees and asks him what does he want as his last wish.The sailor asks for a bowl of chicken soup.The man is kinda puzzled, but agrees.So he goes all the way back up the beach, then all the way up the pathway, and all the way up the spiral staircase.He prepares chicken soup up in his cabin in the lighthouse.Then he climbs all the way down the spiral stairs, after that he crosses the long pathway that leads to the beach, and then walks all the way to the end of the beach where the sailor had landed.He gives him the chicken soup he prepared, and then after having the soup, the man dies.The person feels pity on him ,and buries him.After burying him, he goes all the way back up the beach, then all the way up the pathway, and all the way up the spiral staircase.

The next day, he sees another shipwreck on the horizon.Through his telescope, he sees that all the sailors die except one who manages to swim ashore.So he climbs all the way down the spiral stairs, after that he crosses the long pathway that leads to the beach, and then walks all the way to the end of the beach where this sailor had landed.On reaching the person, he realised that this man was also at the edge of death...so as a last wish this sailor too asks for one last wish to be granted.The man from the lighthouse agrees and asks him what does he want as his last wish.The sailor asks for a bowl of prawn soup.The man is now really puzzled, but agrees.So he goes all the way back up the beach, then all the way up the pathway, and all the way up the spiral staircase.He prepares prawn soup up in his cabin in the lighthouse.Then he climbs all the way down the spiral stairs, after that he crosses the long pathway that leads to the beach, and then walks all the way to the end of the beach where the sailor had landed.He gives him the prawn soup he prepared, and then after having the soup, the man dies.The person feels pity on him ,and buries him.After burying him, he goes all the way back up the beach, then all the way up the pathway, and all the way up the spiral staircase.

The next day, he sees another shipwreck on the horizon.Through his telescope, he again sees that all the sailors die except one who amazingly manages to swim ashore.So he climbs all the way down the spiral stairs, after that he crosses the long pathway that leads to the beach, and then walks all the way to the end of the beach where the sailor had landed.On reaching the person, he realised that this man was also at the edge of death...so as a last wish this sailor too asks for one last wish to be granted.The man from the lighthouse agrees and asks him what does he want as his last wish.The sailor asks for a bowl of chicken soup.The man is now completely puzzled, but agrees with some hesitation.So he goes all the way back up the beach, then all the way up the pathway, and all the way up the spiral staircase.He prepares prawn soup up in his cabin in the lighthouse.Then he climbs all the way down the spiral stairs, after that he crosses the long pathway that leads to the beach, and then walks all the way to the end of the beach where the sailor had landed.He give him the chicken soup he prepared, and then after having the soup, the man dies.The person feels pity on him ,and buries him.After burying him, he goes all the way back up the beach, then all the way up the pathway, and all the way up the spiral staircase.

What is the moral of the story??

10) Hitler's Drink

2005-11-28T05:38:00.000-08:00

Ok, I’ve been too lazy with my web sites and I’m gonna stop. As Sciz inspired me – I need to stop and focus. Thanks for the support buddy. But I’m gonna need all your help. If you like this site the please tell your friends about so that they may have a heart attack too. Anyways here’s the Chalu for Today:

Which drink did Hitler hate the most?

Answer: ‘Juice’ Get it? (No offense)

9) Chapati: Redefined

2005-11-10T09:30:00.000-08:00

What is Chapati?!

[Answer by Sciz in comments....]

8) Pandavas and Modern Mathematics

2005-11-05T07:48:00.000-08:00

I'll make it short and simple, here goes:

' The Pandavas and Kauravas were playing dice. You know the one where Yudishtra betted his whole kingdom! So the game is warming up and the heat is on. After hours of play everybody is exhausted from the heat - They need to have a drink quick! Yudishtra asked his servent to bring him *iced* drinks. But the refrigerator wasn't invented at the time. The servent was in trouble. But you know these Indians - Damn intelligent they're( and good chaluans too!). You know what he did?!.....

He integrated* the dice into ice!'

* Integration and Differentiation from Mathematics!

7) How to take ur medicine

2005-11-05T07:32:00.000-08:00

Well, its been a while folks and Sciz been bothering me about updating the site! SO I'm back with a true killer. This'll keep him down for a couple of weeks! Ok here goes... Q:A sardarji once cut the 4 sides of a capsule and ate the middile part, Why?! A:Yo have no side effects Howzzat?! * This Chalu Factory was made exclusively for Chalu Factory by Emil George Abraham (The 'Mash')

Chalu Factory: The Source of all Chalu....

2005-09-29T09:40:00.000-07:00

Now you have the chance to contribute your Chalus to the fastest growing Chalu site in the web. Witness Chalus in the making, add your ideas, contribute your Chalus, give someone a heart attack.... Its easy, its chalu, its the Chalu Factory. To Sign Up goto: 11b Forum and enter the Chalu Factory section in 'Smalltalk'. Happy Chaluadi!

- Master Chaluan

6) More than a thousand words.....

2005-09-29T09:14:00.000-07:00

Well, that explains a lot!

- Master Chaluan

Mind your Tongue!

2005-09-29T08:50:00.000-07:00

This is a nice one actually. (What a relief, Whew!)

"There were 4 guys John, Franky, Manav and Ashley who found a small bottle. When they rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared. Thankful that they had released him , the genie said, "Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I will give each of you a wish. When you run towards the pool and jump, you shout what you want the pool of water to become, and then your wish will come true." John ran towards the pool, jumped and shouted "Wine". The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine. John was ecstatic. Next came Franky. He did the same and shouted, "Vodka" and immersed himself into a pool of vodka. Manav jumped and shouted, "Beer". The last of them was Ashley. He was running towards the pool when suddenly he stepped on a banana peel. He slipped towards the pool and shouted, "Shit!!!!!!!........."

Moral of the story : Mind your language; you never know what it will land you in!"

Taken from DesiHouse Forum

- Master Chaluan

5) With Beds and Calenders!

2005-09-27T21:20:00.000-07:00

BE WARNED: This one is an absolute killer. Do Not, I repeat do not read this if you are weak at heart! Having said that here goes:

A Man was locked in a room with only a calender and a Spring bed, nothing else - Nothing to eat or drink. But he survived for an whole year in that room. Can you even give a guess how he did this?

Most probably not. So here goes the hazarduos answer:

'He ate the 'Dates' form the calendar(!) and drank water from the 'Springs' in the bed.' (Don't beat me, I didn't make this!)

- Master Chaluan

4) The things ppl do to Smoke!

2005-09-23T08:45:00.000-07:00

Smoking may be injurious to health but that's nothing compared to what this chalu can do to you :D . Its an old one but one of the classics. Hold on to your butts coz here it goes:

A man was sitting on a boat with with a lot of load on it. The boat is at the middle of open sea and there is not grain of sand to be seen for miles around. He has a cigar in hand and he wants to smoke it. But he hasn't matches or 'lite' of any sort. Later on he did smoke his cigar. Can anyone even guess how he lighted it?

The much painful answer: ' He threw some of the load from the boat out to sean. Thus the boat became 'lighter' and he USED that 'lighter' to light his cigar!' No questions........

Master Chaluan

3) Belief

2005-09-19T14:57:00.000-07:00

What did one Ghost say to another?

Answer: He whispered to the other 'Do you believe in humans?!'

2) Sens

2005-09-15T19:40:00.000-07:00

What is a movie without Sushmita Sen and Riya Sen called?

Answer: Non'sen'se

Contributed by: Sciz from Bangalore

- Master Chaluan

Announcement:

2005-09-15T08:30:00.000-07:00

I had promised a daily update of Chalu, a word that I'll keep as long as this Blog is online. But it should be kept in mind that these Chalus are not my creations (mostly:D). I'm having a short vacation from school now so that I can't operate at full swing. Just wait'll school starts.... You'll be amazed at the number of Chalu's we pop daily. So log on for your daily supply of heart attacks!

- Master Chaluan

1) Polar

2005-09-14T17:29:00.000-07:00

We're at Chemistry tution this Monday (12/9/05). Teacher was talking abt water and its properties. While she was mentioning a particular property of water the bulb popped on Unni's head to give away to one of the best (or worst) Chalu of month. Hold on to your seat belts 'coz here it goes:

'A polar bear (which was particularly good at swimming) was walking on a frozen lake. Suddenly the ice broke and the polar bear fell into the water. It died even though it could swim. Why?'

The much sorrowful answer:

'Because water is a POLAR solvent.'

- Master Chaluan

Definition:

2005-09-14T14:40:00.000-07:00

If you are not from my part of the world you may not know what 'Chalu' is (although you may use it all the time!). 'Chalu' is just the opposite of joke. When jokes make people laugh, chalus are intended to make people mad, angry and believe me, sometimes they can even make you cry. Don't blame me if the content in this blog gives you a heart attack!

- Master Chaluan